Tuesday Night at the Gym

I went to the gym last night. It was hot and sticky Tuesday outside. The gym was crowded with people, half my age. I’m 32, nothing like looking at kids working out to stay fit with their boyfriends ((gag)) and show your lumpy butt up. Regardless, I stayed, I worked out. I was sweating and I was getting into my workout.

As I’m on this Elliptical machine for the first time in my life, I think “This isn’t too bad, I got this.” I look back down to the machine’s screen and realize it has only been 5 minutes.

FUCK. I’m sweating bullets already. Like seriously, that’s it!?

I decided I must zone out and keep going. Sweating is good for me, as much as I find it disgusting, maybe I will learn to love it?

Okay, elliptical, it’s you and me. Stride, strut, let’s do this.

I managed to squeeze in 10 more minutes. I burned 200 calories in 15 minutes. Not bad. I was sweating like it was going out of style. OMG I’m soooo out of shape. Why am I sweating so much?

I wiped down the machine, I moved over to the stationary bike. This can go one of two ways. I love the bike and it becomes my new favorite machine or I hate it and I can’t wait to get off of it.

7 minutes in, I’m sweating and I can’t seem to get my speed up or my consistency but I’m sweating like crazy. WTF. I’m slow, I can’t keep this up. FUCK THIS. I would rather be doing laps on my bike around the lake. I only burned 64 calories and I couldn’t stop sweating. Like seriously, gross sweat. Buckets of sweat.

I hate it.

I continue to go until 15 minutes and I’m totally over it. 111 calories. WTF. I should have stayed on the elliptical. I can’t feel my legs.

I chill for a minute, go get the towel to wipe down the machine and move on with my life.

I head over to strengthen my legs on the hip abduction machines, to strengthen my inner thighs and outer thighs. These two machines are my favorite! Strong legs are sexy legs!

I round out my 45 minutes at the gym guzzling water like it’s going out of style. I wipe down the machines and carry myself slowly to the counter to ask for the hours and then refilled my water bottle. Slowly slip outside, sit in my car and turn the AC on full blast, because of course it is 96 degrees at 8pm.

I get home, down some more water. Debate about eating dinner and forgo that completely so that I can shower and crawl into bed.

But hey, I went. Even when I was probably the 3rd oldest person there, by far one of the largest and most likely the sweatiest.